39 days...

39 days left... I just found out a few minutes ago that there are 39 days left; a month and a half, as I used to think of it, seemed a bit more than 39 days... but I was wrong; next Sunday will be June 3rd, which only leaves me ONE MONTH! One horrible month, full of exams and of people who will be leaving; people with whom I've shared the best period of the last 26 years... people... friends. Today there was the first farewell party. I can't say that I've suffered, I had never spoken to the ones that will be leaving, but I realized that this is only the beginning; more Erasmus students will soon be leaving, and most of them will be people with whom I've built precious memories.
Out of the four of us, I'll be the second one leaving; I know I'm being selfish when I say that I feel somewhat relieved for not being the last one to go... I don't know whether I'd be able to take each one of them to the bus station, and then return home by myself (metaphorically speaking). I've already done it once, for the Easter vacation, and it felt horrible, even if it was for only ten days. However, knowing that I'll be seeing them shortly after will give me enough strength to leave our little "Isla de nunca jamás"... and to go with Gianluca to the horrible bus station.
I can't be sad... I don't want to end this precious time with a month of tears and isolation; I'd be cheating on who I am and throwing everything out the window. I'm just a little sad right now, after learning that I only have 39 days left.